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       Posted by SEXYSUZY1 Posted on November 28, 2009 View Comments 1      
Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?

The host of the TV quiz show “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?” enter home and found his wife pregnant; he ask her ... where this come from?

She replied: I asked a friend

The host very angry takes her to the court where the judge tell him, you so god damn lucky that she didn’t asked the audience.

       Posted by INDEMAND Posted on November 20, 2009 View Comments 1      
Husband and wife golf lessons

A husband and wife love to golf together, but neither of them was playing like they wanted to, so they decide to take private lessons. The husband has his lesson first. After the pro sees his swing, he says, "No, no, no, you're gripping the club way too hard!"

"Well, what should I do?” asks the man. "Hold the club gently," the pro replied, "just like you'd hold your wife's breast." Taking the advice, he takes a swing, and POW! He hits the ball 250 yards straight up the fairway. The ecstatic man goes back to his wife with the good news, and the wife can't wait for her lesson.

The next day the wife goes for her lesson. The pro watches her swing and says, "No, no, no, you're gripping the club way too hard." "What can I do?" asks the wife. "Hold the club gently, just like you'd hold your husband's penis."

The wife listens carefully to the pro's advice, takes a swing, and THUMP, the ball skips down the fairway about 15 feet.

"You know, that was a lot better than I expected," the pro says. "Now, take the club out of your mouth and hold it in your hands..."

       Posted by FINEFUN4US Posted on November 3, 2009 View Comments 1      
martian swingers

A Martian couple landed on the earth. The emerged from their spacecraft and went up to a farmhouse. They knocked on the door. When the farmer and his wife answered, they announced that they were from Mars and wanted to come in to chat. The farm couple extended their hospitality and they all seemed to hit it off well. After a while, the farmer said "Do you two swing?"

The martian replied, "yes", and so they swapped mates and adjourned for appropriate activity.

After the martian man had climbed on, he said to the earth woman, "Is my dick long enough?"

She replied, "Well, now that you mention it, I would like it a little longer."

He said "no problem" and proceded to twist his left ear and, like magic, his dick got longer. "How's that now?"

"One notch more" said the woman.

Her request was promptly complied with via another twist of the left ear. His next question was "Would you like it a little thicker?"

She replied "yes" and he twisted his right ear once. The woman said "That's perfect!" and they proceeded to bang away.

The next morning the earth couple were comparing experiences and the husband said "how was it for you?" The wife replied, "Super! How about you?"

The husband responded, "It was pretty good, but she damn near twisted my ears off!"