Home Archives Create Topic About
       Posted by BROOK Posted on April 24, 2008 View Comments 0      
Hell Explained By a Chemistry Student
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term.The answer was so profound that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the internet, which is, of course why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?Most of the students wrote proofs of their belief's by using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when compressed or some variant.One student, however, wrote the following.First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.So we need to know the rate a which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today.Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more that one religion, we can project that all souls will go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the  temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as  souls are  added.                    This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls are entering then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.2. If Hell is  expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.                                  So, which is it?If we accept the postulate give to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept on shouting "Oh My God"                     This student received an A+