A man came home very late, pissed out of his tree, to find his wife waiting for him at the door."WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" she screams, "It´s FOUR IN THE MORNING!"He
says, "Err, I just stopped at this bar, I was only going to have one
drink...but this bar, it was incredible. EVERYTHING in it was
gold-plated. They had a gold rail under the bar, gold ashtrays, they
served the drinks in gold shot-glasses, and the table posts were all
gold-plated, even the mirror behind the bar was gold. The cash register
was gold. I was so amazed by all this gold, I just kept ordering
drinks, so I could stay in the bar and look at it. Hell, even when I
went to the Men´s Room to take a leak, they had gold-plated
urinals...it was wonderful.""I don´t believe that story for one minute," his wife said. "What was this place called?""Hell," he replies, "I can´t remember...I got too drunk, and I forgot.""You´ll have to prove it to me tomorrow when you sober up, or I´m going to divorce you!" she said.The
next day, the man looks through the Yellow Pages under "BARS", but none
of the names ring a bell. He decides that he´ll call all the bars
listed, and ask the bartenders about the decor in their establishments.
He´s called about 50 bars so far, and still no luck. Finally, he calls
one bar, asks his question, and the bartender says that, yes, they are
the bar with all the gold-plated stuff. "Here," the man says, handing
the phone to his wife. "Ask this bartender if I´m lying!"The
wife gets on the line, and begins to ask the bartender about all the
things her husband had told her about on the previous night... the
rail, the shot-glasses, the mirrors, the table posts and the cash
register. Finally, she says, "Now, this may seem like a strange
question, but my husband says you even have gold-plated urinals...do
you?"The bartender puts the phone down on the bar, but she hears him yell "HEY LOUIE! I think I know who pissed in your saxophone..." |